would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Hippo gnu deer
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
