Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
