it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
