I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize