I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
40s are totally the cure
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
