I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize