i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
