im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
