How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
