This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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