She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize
