bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
This is the high leading the old right now
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize
