have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
