Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Randomize
