butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
