The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
