No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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