i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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