I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
