He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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