make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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