I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize
