So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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