Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
