Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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