he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
