And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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