the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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