therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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