I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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