That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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