I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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