I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
