How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
