Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
