coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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