thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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