I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
