if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
