I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
