So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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