I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
