He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Randomize
