i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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