i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
