he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize