She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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