I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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