Got a toothbrush?
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
it's like iHOP with fire
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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