i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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